Saturday, April 10, 2010

I Dreamed a Dream

definitions from ...

dream (drm)
1. A series of images, ideas, emotions, and sensations occurring involuntarily in the mind during certain stages of sleep.
2. A daydream; a reverie.
3. A state of abstraction; a trance.
4. A wild fancy or hope.
5. A condition or achievement that is longed for; an aspiration.
6. One that is exceptionally gratifying, excellent, or beautiful.

v. dreamed or dreamt (drmt), dream·ing, dreams
1. To experience a dream in sleep: dreamed of meeting an old friend.
2. To daydream.
3. To have a deep aspiration: dreaming of a world at peace.
4. To regard something as feasible or practical.
1. To experience a dream of while asleep.
2. To conceive of; imagine.
3. To pass (time) idly or in reverie.

Do you still dream? I'm talking definition # 5 ... dream ... long for, aspire ... do I still dream?

from Lés Miserables ...

There was a time when men were kind,
And their voices were soft,
And their words inviting.
There was a time when love was blind,
And the world was a song,
And the song was exciting.
There was a time when it all went wrong...

I dreamed a dream in time gone by,
When hope was high and life, worth living.
I dreamed that love would never die,
I dreamed that God would be forgiving.
Then I was young and unafraid,
And dreams were made and used and wasted.
There was no ransom to be paid,
No song unsung, no wine, untasted.

But the tigers come at night,
With their voices soft as thunder,
As they tear your hope apart,
And they turn your dream to shame.

He slept a summer by my side,
He filled my days with endless wonder...
He took my childhood in his stride,
But he was gone when autumn came!

And still I dream he'll come to me,
That we will live the years together,
But there are dreams that cannot be,
And there are storms we cannot weather!

I had a dream my life would be
So different from this hell I'm living,
So different now from what it seemed...
Now life has killed the dream I dreamed...

I've been at a point in my life where I don't remember my dreams. I don't remember what I once longed for. I feel sad for her, that girl, that confidence not kept, that hope lost. I feel sad for the woman that no longer knows how to dream ... the woman who no longer has a dream.

"Don't laugh at some else's dreams, because people without dreams don't have much."
~ unkown

I do remember one of my girlhood dreams. I was going to be a marine biologist. Well, maybe what I really wanted to be was a dolphin trainer. I was going to go to college in Florida (I'm from Northern New York state) and I was going to spend all of my days in the ocean swimming with the dolphins. Swimming ... training ... entertaining and teaching children about these beloved creatures of mine. I never went to college ... not even in Florida. I've not spent many days in the ocean. I've never swam with a dolphin.

There is no excuse not to dream.
~ Dove Promises

I can list a thousand excuses not to dream. I have no money. No time. My children need me. Maybe when they're older. Maybe when I'm older. But these really are excuses. They mean nothing. They shouldn't prohibit me. They should not stop my dream ... my dreaming. Yet they do.

"Dreams are illustrations... from the book your soul is writing about you."
~ Marsha Norman

I wonder why I don't have dreams now. Yes, I have needs, wants, wishes even. But dreams? Do I really dream for anything? Do I have a longing that no one and nothing can stop me from pursuing or attaining it. My soul wants to write about me. My heart wants to know me. My mind wants to remember my dreams ... or create new ones.

"Dreams are like may never touch them,but if you follow them they will lead you to your Destiny."
~ Unknown

My dream ... my dream is to dream again.

Faith, Hope, & Love

"FAITH: to see one thing before my eyes, but to live with a certainty that there is something better beyond my seeing."

I have that quote written in the front of my Bible. Most of the time I feel like I have faith smaller than that proverbial mustard seed. But I also know that if don't keep at least that much, then I have nothing.

"Practice hope. As hopefulness becomes a habit, you can achieve a permanently happy spirit."
~ Norman Vincent Peale

Practice makes perfect? I hope that things will get better. I hope that my loved ones and I remain healthy. I hope that someday I can achieve that permanently happy spirit. So in the meantime, I will practice.

"Love wasn't put in your heart to stay. Love isn't love 'till you give it away."

We all want to feel love; to be loved. But can we truly achieve that if we don't love; if we don't give love; if we withhold love? There's a Swedish Proverb that goes like this: "Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it." The truth that holds ...

"Every day offers a chance to choose anger or understanding, bitterness or acceptance, darkness or light. And the choices we make reveal the stuff we’re made of."
~ Robin McGraw

I want to understand. I want to accept. I want to see the light. So each day, as much as is humanly possible, I will choose to have faith, practice hope, and give love.